{"id":3695,"date":"2019-05-12T07:51:35","date_gmt":"2019-05-12T14:51:35","guid":{"rendered":"http:\/\/www.ourthoughts.ca\/?p=3695"},"modified":"2019-02-02T15:08:59","modified_gmt":"2019-02-02T22:08:59","slug":"how-my-mum-gives-me-hope","status":"publish","type":"post","link":"https:\/\/www.ourthoughts.ca\/2019\/05\/12\/how-my-mum-gives-me-hope\/","title":{"rendered":"How my mum gives me hope"},"content":{"rendered":"\n

I was reorganizing my Google Drive folders back in February and came across this old writeup I did for a book. I don\u2019t even remember writing it, nor do I remember the request for the writeup. When I reread it, I thought I\u2019d create a post out of it and schedule it for Mother\u2019s Day.\u00a0I wrote\u00a0it\u00a0in\u00a02011.<\/em><\/p>\n\n\n\n\n\n\n\n

I was a bit taken aback when Gary Toyn contacted me about submitting an essay for this book. He said he was looking for prominent Latter-day Saints to comment on their mothers. If anything, I\u2019ve considered myself a pretty obscure person.
<\/p>\n\n\n\n

I was born in a place called Moose Jaw. Can you get more obscure than that? My preschool years were spent living for months at a time in numerous small towns around southern Saskatchewan. When my parents finally joined the church in Regina, we attended a branch. I went to 6 different schools in Regina because we never stayed in a house longer than 3 years. It seemed each time we moved, I attended a new ward. I served my mission in Utah. I married someone who was a second generation Mormon on her Dad\u2019s side and third generation on her mum\u2019s. We live in Southern Alberta with our 4 children. I\u2019m our ward executive secretary.
<\/p>\n\n\n\n

I\u2019m just your run-of-the-mill Mormon: unremarkable, obscure, and unknown.
<\/p>\n\n\n\n

Yet here I am, talking about my mother, who is likely just as unknown. Whenever I am asked to write or speak about my mum, one word always comes to mind first: sacrifice.
<\/p>\n\n\n\n

Right from the very start, my mum has sacrificed a lot. She certainly wasn\u2019t planning on my coming along, and it interrupted her long laid plans for school at a prestigious Canadian university. Hello, baby boy. Goodbye, full scholarship.
<\/p>\n\n\n\n

When she and my dad separated not many months after my baby sister was born, she raised the two of us on her own, working at pizza joints to support us. I can only imagine how stressful and hectic daily life must have been for her. My memories of the time are few, but I remember daycare (or at least being in the care of someone), her work, few friends.
<\/p>\n\n\n\n

I remember, as a three-year-old, making toast for my toddler sister because we were up before my mum and we were hungry. Looking back, I have to wonder if the reason we were up and she wasn\u2019t was because she was exhausted. It\u2019s not easy to work long shifts and come home to take care of 2 young children and all that entails.
<\/p>\n\n\n\n

Apparently, it wasn\u2019t enough work though because she decided to answer an ad to care for 3 small boys of a single father in the city. So, here she was, a 21-year-old looking after her own 2 children and the 3 children of her employer while he was at work. The oldest was five years old.
<\/p>\n\n\n\n

And if that wasn\u2019t enough, she ended up falling in love with the boys\u2019 father and they were married, meaning she now had 5 children\u20145 and under\u2014to care for all day long.
<\/p>\n\n\n\n

At one point, while the five of us suffered mumps, measles, and chicken pox all at the same time, our house was put under quarantine, and guess who remained in the quarantine the entire time? My mum.
<\/p>\n\n\n\n

When my stepfather was laid off about 4 years later, my mum went back to school. She never did get back to university, but she attended nursing school. Once graduated, she worked long hours at one of the local hospitals to contribute to the household income. It was a never ending battle to feed a family of growing children.
<\/p>\n\n\n\n

When my stepfather moved to Vancouver to find work and a home, guess who looked after 5 teenaged children on her own, then drove us through the mountains on her own with all the screaming, arguing, and fighting that comes along with a station wagon full of teenagers?
<\/p>\n\n\n\n

Does she still sacrifice for us now that we are all grown and some of us have teenagers of our own? Sure. Not too long ago, she scrimped and saved and sacrificed so she could pay for a week-long, all-expense paid vacation to Hawai\u2019i. It was an amazing experience and a much needed break from the stresses of our lives back home.
<\/p>\n\n\n\n

But that\u2019s not all.
<\/p>\n\n\n\n

How many nights has she sacrificed sleep while she lay awake worrying about whether her grown children had enough money or were making the right choices or were avoiding the mistakes she made? How many meals has she sacrificed in order to help out her children when they needed money for this or that? How many tears has she shed while shaking her head at some of the choices we\u2019ve made? How many steps of pain has she taken to walk with her grandchildren?
<\/p>\n\n\n\n

I know this topic seems to be quintessential to motherhood, and I don\u2019t write this tritely. I sincerely see my mother as someone who has sacrificed her entire life for the benefit of her children. Not because she is a mother and feels that\u2019s what good mothers do, but because that\u2019s just who she is.
<\/p>\n\n\n\n

Whether it\u2019s volunteering hours in her calling as a stake family history director, single-handedly putting together two family reunions in two years, organizing all the logistics of a week-long vacation to Hawai\u2019i, or the days each week she puts in as a temple worker, it\u2019s just who she is. Whether it\u2019s for her children or for others, she\u2019s always sacrificing.
<\/p>\n\n\n\n

I\u2019ve learned a lot from her. I\u2019m nowhere near the sacrificer she is. In fact, in a lot of ways, I\u2019m nothing like her. I often think of myself at the expense of others. But I do try. I know where I fall short, and I try to make improvements. I like to think I am better than I was, say, 5 years ago, but I am under no illusion that I am perfectly selfless, and I realize have a long way to go.
<\/p>\n\n\n\n

But thinking of my mum gives me hope. Hope that I can be better, and hope that there are others like her out there, making the world better.
<\/p>\n","protected":false},"excerpt":{"rendered":"

I was reorganizing my Google Drive folders back in February and came across this old writeup I did for a book. I don\u2019t even remember writing it, nor do I remember the request for the writeup. When I reread it, I thought I\u2019d create a post out of it and schedule it for Mother\u2019s Day. I wrote it in 2011. Continue reading How my mum gives me hope<\/span><\/a><\/p>\n","protected":false},"author":3,"featured_media":3696,"comment_status":"open","ping_status":"open","sticky":false,"template":"","format":"standard","meta":{"footnotes":""},"categories":[65],"tags":[],"class_list":["post-3695","post","type-post","status-publish","format-standard","has-post-thumbnail","hentry","category-parenting"],"yoast_head":"\nHow my mum gives me hope<\/title>\n<meta name=\"robots\" content=\"index, follow, max-snippet:-1, max-image-preview:large, max-video-preview:-1\" \/>\n<link rel=\"canonical\" href=\"https:\/\/www.ourthoughts.ca\/2019\/05\/12\/how-my-mum-gives-me-hope\/\" \/>\n<meta property=\"og:locale\" content=\"en_US\" \/>\n<meta property=\"og:type\" content=\"article\" \/>\n<meta property=\"og:title\" content=\"How my mum gives me hope\" \/>\n<meta property=\"og:description\" content=\"I was reorganizing my Google Drive folders back in February and came across this old writeup I did for a book. I don\u2019t even remember writing it, nor do I remember the request for the writeup. When I reread it, I thought I\u2019d create a post out of it and schedule it for Mother\u2019s Day. I wrote it in 2011.\" \/>\n<meta property=\"og:url\" content=\"https:\/\/www.ourthoughts.ca\/2019\/05\/12\/how-my-mum-gives-me-hope\/\" \/>\n<meta property=\"og:site_name\" content=\"Our Thoughts\" \/>\n<meta property=\"article:published_time\" content=\"2019-05-12T14:51:35+00:00\" \/>\n<meta property=\"article:modified_time\" content=\"2019-02-02T22:08:59+00:00\" \/>\n<meta property=\"og:image\" content=\"https:\/\/www.ourthoughts.ca\/wp-content\/uploads\/2019\/02\/baby-2980940.jpg\" \/>\n\t<meta property=\"og:image:width\" content=\"4000\" \/>\n\t<meta property=\"og:image:height\" content=\"2604\" \/>\n\t<meta property=\"og:image:type\" content=\"image\/jpeg\" \/>\n<meta name=\"author\" content=\"Kim Siever\" \/>\n<meta name=\"twitter:card\" content=\"summary_large_image\" \/>\n<meta name=\"twitter:label1\" content=\"Written by\" \/>\n\t<meta name=\"twitter:data1\" content=\"Kim Siever\" \/>\n\t<meta name=\"twitter:label2\" content=\"Est. reading time\" \/>\n\t<meta name=\"twitter:data2\" content=\"5 minutes\" \/>\n<script type=\"application\/ld+json\" class=\"yoast-schema-graph\">{\"@context\":\"https:\/\/schema.org\",\"@graph\":[{\"@type\":\"WebPage\",\"@id\":\"https:\/\/www.ourthoughts.ca\/2019\/05\/12\/how-my-mum-gives-me-hope\/\",\"url\":\"https:\/\/www.ourthoughts.ca\/2019\/05\/12\/how-my-mum-gives-me-hope\/\",\"name\":\"How my mum gives me hope\",\"isPartOf\":{\"@id\":\"https:\/\/www.ourthoughts.ca\/#website\"},\"primaryImageOfPage\":{\"@id\":\"https:\/\/www.ourthoughts.ca\/2019\/05\/12\/how-my-mum-gives-me-hope\/#primaryimage\"},\"image\":{\"@id\":\"https:\/\/www.ourthoughts.ca\/2019\/05\/12\/how-my-mum-gives-me-hope\/#primaryimage\"},\"thumbnailUrl\":\"https:\/\/www.ourthoughts.ca\/wp-content\/uploads\/2019\/02\/baby-2980940.jpg\",\"datePublished\":\"2019-05-12T14:51:35+00:00\",\"dateModified\":\"2019-02-02T22:08:59+00:00\",\"author\":{\"@id\":\"https:\/\/www.ourthoughts.ca\/#\/schema\/person\/99e996edc89affe5206808d3f65869d1\"},\"inLanguage\":\"en-US\",\"potentialAction\":[{\"@type\":\"ReadAction\",\"target\":[\"https:\/\/www.ourthoughts.ca\/2019\/05\/12\/how-my-mum-gives-me-hope\/\"]}]},{\"@type\":\"ImageObject\",\"inLanguage\":\"en-US\",\"@id\":\"https:\/\/www.ourthoughts.ca\/2019\/05\/12\/how-my-mum-gives-me-hope\/#primaryimage\",\"url\":\"https:\/\/www.ourthoughts.ca\/wp-content\/uploads\/2019\/02\/baby-2980940.jpg\",\"contentUrl\":\"https:\/\/www.ourthoughts.ca\/wp-content\/uploads\/2019\/02\/baby-2980940.jpg\",\"width\":4000,\"height\":2604},{\"@type\":\"WebSite\",\"@id\":\"https:\/\/www.ourthoughts.ca\/#website\",\"url\":\"https:\/\/www.ourthoughts.ca\/\",\"name\":\"Our Thoughts\",\"description\":\"Thought-provoking commentary on life, politics, religion and social issues.\",\"potentialAction\":[{\"@type\":\"SearchAction\",\"target\":{\"@type\":\"EntryPoint\",\"urlTemplate\":\"https:\/\/www.ourthoughts.ca\/?s={search_term_string}\"},\"query-input\":{\"@type\":\"PropertyValueSpecification\",\"valueRequired\":true,\"valueName\":\"search_term_string\"}}],\"inLanguage\":\"en-US\"},{\"@type\":\"Person\",\"@id\":\"https:\/\/www.ourthoughts.ca\/#\/schema\/person\/99e996edc89affe5206808d3f65869d1\",\"name\":\"Kim Siever\",\"image\":{\"@type\":\"ImageObject\",\"inLanguage\":\"en-US\",\"@id\":\"https:\/\/www.ourthoughts.ca\/#\/schema\/person\/image\/\",\"url\":\"https:\/\/secure.gravatar.com\/avatar\/417c7b5f55d329bdd0f64ef4396831db?s=96&d=mm&r=g\",\"contentUrl\":\"https:\/\/secure.gravatar.com\/avatar\/417c7b5f55d329bdd0f64ef4396831db?s=96&d=mm&r=g\",\"caption\":\"Kim Siever\"},\"description\":\"Queer Mormon poet with radical political views. I have been married 27 years, and we have 6 children. Sunday school president. Served in the Utah Provo Mission.\",\"sameAs\":[\"http:\/\/www.hotpepper.ca\/\"],\"url\":\"https:\/\/www.ourthoughts.ca\/author\/kim-siever\/\"}]}<\/script>\n<!-- \/ Yoast SEO plugin. -->","yoast_head_json":{"title":"How my mum gives me hope","robots":{"index":"index","follow":"follow","max-snippet":"max-snippet:-1","max-image-preview":"max-image-preview:large","max-video-preview":"max-video-preview:-1"},"canonical":"https:\/\/www.ourthoughts.ca\/2019\/05\/12\/how-my-mum-gives-me-hope\/","og_locale":"en_US","og_type":"article","og_title":"How my mum gives me hope","og_description":"I was reorganizing my Google Drive folders back in February and came across this old writeup I did for a book. I don\u2019t even remember writing it, nor do I remember the request for the writeup. When I reread it, I thought I\u2019d create a post out of it and schedule it for Mother\u2019s Day. I wrote it in 2011.","og_url":"https:\/\/www.ourthoughts.ca\/2019\/05\/12\/how-my-mum-gives-me-hope\/","og_site_name":"Our Thoughts","article_published_time":"2019-05-12T14:51:35+00:00","article_modified_time":"2019-02-02T22:08:59+00:00","og_image":[{"width":4000,"height":2604,"url":"https:\/\/www.ourthoughts.ca\/wp-content\/uploads\/2019\/02\/baby-2980940.jpg","type":"image\/jpeg"}],"author":"Kim Siever","twitter_card":"summary_large_image","twitter_misc":{"Written by":"Kim Siever","Est. reading time":"5 minutes"},"schema":{"@context":"https:\/\/schema.org","@graph":[{"@type":"WebPage","@id":"https:\/\/www.ourthoughts.ca\/2019\/05\/12\/how-my-mum-gives-me-hope\/","url":"https:\/\/www.ourthoughts.ca\/2019\/05\/12\/how-my-mum-gives-me-hope\/","name":"How my mum gives me hope","isPartOf":{"@id":"https:\/\/www.ourthoughts.ca\/#website"},"primaryImageOfPage":{"@id":"https:\/\/www.ourthoughts.ca\/2019\/05\/12\/how-my-mum-gives-me-hope\/#primaryimage"},"image":{"@id":"https:\/\/www.ourthoughts.ca\/2019\/05\/12\/how-my-mum-gives-me-hope\/#primaryimage"},"thumbnailUrl":"https:\/\/www.ourthoughts.ca\/wp-content\/uploads\/2019\/02\/baby-2980940.jpg","datePublished":"2019-05-12T14:51:35+00:00","dateModified":"2019-02-02T22:08:59+00:00","author":{"@id":"https:\/\/www.ourthoughts.ca\/#\/schema\/person\/99e996edc89affe5206808d3f65869d1"},"inLanguage":"en-US","potentialAction":[{"@type":"ReadAction","target":["https:\/\/www.ourthoughts.ca\/2019\/05\/12\/how-my-mum-gives-me-hope\/"]}]},{"@type":"ImageObject","inLanguage":"en-US","@id":"https:\/\/www.ourthoughts.ca\/2019\/05\/12\/how-my-mum-gives-me-hope\/#primaryimage","url":"https:\/\/www.ourthoughts.ca\/wp-content\/uploads\/2019\/02\/baby-2980940.jpg","contentUrl":"https:\/\/www.ourthoughts.ca\/wp-content\/uploads\/2019\/02\/baby-2980940.jpg","width":4000,"height":2604},{"@type":"WebSite","@id":"https:\/\/www.ourthoughts.ca\/#website","url":"https:\/\/www.ourthoughts.ca\/","name":"Our Thoughts","description":"Thought-provoking commentary on life, politics, religion and social issues.","potentialAction":[{"@type":"SearchAction","target":{"@type":"EntryPoint","urlTemplate":"https:\/\/www.ourthoughts.ca\/?s={search_term_string}"},"query-input":{"@type":"PropertyValueSpecification","valueRequired":true,"valueName":"search_term_string"}}],"inLanguage":"en-US"},{"@type":"Person","@id":"https:\/\/www.ourthoughts.ca\/#\/schema\/person\/99e996edc89affe5206808d3f65869d1","name":"Kim Siever","image":{"@type":"ImageObject","inLanguage":"en-US","@id":"https:\/\/www.ourthoughts.ca\/#\/schema\/person\/image\/","url":"https:\/\/secure.gravatar.com\/avatar\/417c7b5f55d329bdd0f64ef4396831db?s=96&d=mm&r=g","contentUrl":"https:\/\/secure.gravatar.com\/avatar\/417c7b5f55d329bdd0f64ef4396831db?s=96&d=mm&r=g","caption":"Kim Siever"},"description":"Queer Mormon poet with radical political views. I have been married 27 years, and we have 6 children. Sunday school president. Served in the Utah Provo Mission.","sameAs":["http:\/\/www.hotpepper.ca\/"],"url":"https:\/\/www.ourthoughts.ca\/author\/kim-siever\/"}]}},"_links":{"self":[{"href":"https:\/\/www.ourthoughts.ca\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/posts\/3695"}],"collection":[{"href":"https:\/\/www.ourthoughts.ca\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/posts"}],"about":[{"href":"https:\/\/www.ourthoughts.ca\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/types\/post"}],"author":[{"embeddable":true,"href":"https:\/\/www.ourthoughts.ca\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/users\/3"}],"replies":[{"embeddable":true,"href":"https:\/\/www.ourthoughts.ca\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/comments?post=3695"}],"version-history":[{"count":1,"href":"https:\/\/www.ourthoughts.ca\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/posts\/3695\/revisions"}],"predecessor-version":[{"id":3697,"href":"https:\/\/www.ourthoughts.ca\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/posts\/3695\/revisions\/3697"}],"wp:featuredmedia":[{"embeddable":true,"href":"https:\/\/www.ourthoughts.ca\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/media\/3696"}],"wp:attachment":[{"href":"https:\/\/www.ourthoughts.ca\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/media?parent=3695"}],"wp:term":[{"taxonomy":"category","embeddable":true,"href":"https:\/\/www.ourthoughts.ca\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/categories?post=3695"},{"taxonomy":"post_tag","embeddable":true,"href":"https:\/\/www.ourthoughts.ca\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/tags?post=3695"}],"curies":[{"name":"wp","href":"https:\/\/api.w.org\/{rel}","templated":true}]}}