The family isn’t under attack

When someone says that gay marriage will “destroy the family”, what they mean is that it will force them to change their definition of family. Same goes for the phrase “attack on the family”? The family isn’t under attack.

And what do they mean by “family”? Whose family?

The single parent? The grandparents raising their grandchildren? The divorced parents trying to jointly raise their children? The childless couple? The father and mother with adopted children? The parents with foster children? The gay couple with children? The unmarried couple with children? The adult child raising their orphaned siblings?

Let’s be clear, when they say “family”, they mean heteronormative families. The only time anyone raises the family battle cry is whenever the topic of LGBTQ rights arises.

No one writes status updates about spousal abuse destroying the family. No one is creating memes about child abuse destroying the family. Things that actually threaten families.

Gay marriage doesn’t threaten families; it supports the value of the family as a foundational institution that successful societies are based upon. The rights of trans people to use the washroom where they feel safest don’t threaten families. The rights of LGBTQ people to raise their children in the religion of their choice don’t threaten families.

In fact, the people who are actually destroying families are straight people. So let’s clean up our own house first. Let’s take care of the beam in our own eye first.